Born on Oct 7, 1960 in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, USA. Reportedly 5' 5".

Back in the beginning of the eighties, when I was still a kid, my mom tried to explain to me what the big deal with Judy Landers was.

We were watching an episode of BJ and the Bear, 1979’s trucker version of Baywatch. In one scene, Judy Landers empties a canteen of water down her front while waiting for a cop to write her a speeding ticket. The cop, seeing her in her wet T-shirt, becomes so entranced and befuddled that he finds himself unable to do anything but stammer and drool, whereupon Judy drives away, smiling and ticket-free.

Though the camera had repeatedly zoomed in on Judy’s drenched chest during that scene, I couldn’t see whatever it was that the cop saw. She was wearing a bra, after all, so no nipples were poking through, leaving me at a loss to see what all the hubbub was about.

“She’s called ‘Stacks’,” my mom said, surprised that she had to say anything at all. “Get it?”

I didn’t see it.

Perhaps I was expecting something more Russ Meyers-esque to warrant a name like “Stacks”. Perhaps I just wasn’t into boobs yet. All I knew was that Judy’s sister Audrey was much prettier, that Judy was actually a tad homely by comparison. How Judy kept getting the Hot Chick roles was a complete mystery to me.

But while my mom took this to be evidence that there would be two grooms on her son’s wedding cake, I was not the only one who thought that Judy was the kind of girl one introduces to prospective dates as having a “great personality”. As a child, Judy was universally regarded as the clear lesser of the Landers sisters: shy, unsmiling, undeveloped, and unattractive (“A little girl with big eyes and high cheekbones and sunken cheeks is strange-looking,” she concedes), she stood in sharp contrast to her older sister Audrey, the bright, beautiful, outgoing actress/model of the family who excelled at everything she did. “I used to ask my mom if I’d ever be pretty,” she once told TV Guide. Her mom assured her she would, but as she left the room would desperately mutter under her breath “Please, God, make it come true”.

The pleading must have worked, because the Almighty eventually smiled on her request ... sort of. He granted her bigger boobs than her sister had on the one hand and injured her back on the other, thus ending her potential gymnastics career (Judy had won the state gymnastics championship, this being the one thing she could do well) and clearing the path for a career in modeling, which in turn led to a role as “Wanda the Bod” in the short-lived series What Really Happened to the Class of ‘65?

After that, Judy played the airheaded Bod in more pilots and TV series than I can recall, most notably Vega$ and BJ and the Bear. In 1985 she broke into b-movies with Hellhole, this new phase of her career culminating in Stewardess School (1986) and Dr. Alien (1988), both of which, I believe, went straight to video. But Hollywood’s ardent fascination with Judy — or her fascination with Hollywood — started to fall limp in the nineties, and after 1995 Judy Landers, the T&A queen of eighties television, quietly disappeared.

Which, surprisingly, is too bad for me. I hadn’t thought about the elusive appeal of “Stacks” in ages, after all, but now — perhaps because of Stewardess School and Dr. Alien’s occasional run on cable — I can finally say, “I get it.”

Also sprach Golem.

Film

• Dragon Fury (1995) .... Bride
• Expert Weapon (1993) .... Lynn
• The Divine Enforcer (1991)
• Club Fed (1990) .... Angelica Paziotopolous
• Dr. Alien (1988) .... Xenobia
• Stewardess School (1987) .... Sugar Dubois
• Tall, Dark and Handsome (1987)
• Armed and Dangerous (1986) .... Noreen
• Deadly Twins (1985) .... Ruth Morrison
• Hellhole (1985) .... Susan
• Doin' Time (1985) .... The Bride
• Tennessee Stallion (1982)
• The Black Marble (1980) .... Pattie Mae
• Skatetown, U.S.A. (1979)
• The Yum-Yum Girls (1976)

• The Damon Charles Total Rehydration System (1991) .... Herself
• Ghost Writer (1989) .... Billie Blaine
• Goldie and the Boxer (1979) .... Bonnie
• The Users (1978) .... Merry Redfield
• The Courage and the Passion (1978)
• Circus of the Stars #8 (1983)
• Circus of the Stars #7 (1982)

• Night Court: “Danny Got His Gun: Part 1” (1988) .... Major Roberta Savage
• Murder, She Wrote: “Night of the Headless Horseman” (1/4/1987) .... Bobbie
• New Love, American Style: “Love And Marriage Test” (1986)
• New Love, American Style: “Love And The Teenage Daughter” (1986)
• Night Court: “The Apartment” (1986) .... Dan's Date
• Knight Rider: “Knight Strike” (4/5/1985) .... Shiela
• The Hitchhiker: “Split Decision” (6/23/1984) .... Frances Packard
• Night Court: “The Former Harry Stone” (1/18/1984) .... Vickie Guyer
• Fantasy Island: “Bojangles and the Dancer” (1984)
• Fantasy Island: “Deuces Are Wild” (1984)
• Knight Rider: “Forget Me Not” (12/17/1982) .... Micki Bradburn
• The Fall Guy: “Three For The Road” (4/14/1982) .... Jinx
• Madame's Place (1982) .... Sara Joy
• B.J. and the Bear (1981) .... Stacks
• CHiPs: “The Great 5k Star Race and Boulder Wrap Party (Part 2)” (12/7/1980) .... Herself [uncredited]
• Buck Rogers in the 25th Century: “Space Rockers” (2/21/1980) .... Joanna
• Charlie's Angels: “Love Boat Angels: Part 1” (9/12/1979) .... Blond girl
• Charlie's Angels: “Angels on the Run” (5/3/1978) .... Mrs. Chicken
• Vega$ (1978-1979) .... Angie Turner
• Happy Days: “Bye Bye Blackball” (11/29/1977) .... Boom Boom
• The Love Boat: “A Different Girl” (1977)
• The Love Boat: “His Girls Friday” (1977) .... Cindy Nevins
• The Love Boat: “Marrying For Money” (1977)
• The Love Boat: “Mothers Don't Do That” (1977)
• The Love Boat: “Oh, My Aching Brother” (1977)
• The Love Boat: “Substitute Lover” (1977)
• The Love Boat: “The Man Who Loved Women” (1977)

Cyber Temples

• Judy Landers Celebrity Movie Reviews
  Mr. Skin
  Bio, filmography, and stills and clips from her films

Miscellaneous

• Judy Landers Filmography
  Internet Movie Database
  Always up-to-date filmography
• Judy Landers
  Wikipedia
  Judy Landers in wikireality