Dollhouse R.I.P.

I was happy as the next guy to see Eliza Dushku back on the air, but was there anyone out there who’d seen an episode of Dollhouse and didn’t see this coming?

Anyone? Anyone?

That’s what I thought.

The Fox sci-fi drama will finish out the 13-episode order before closing its doors for good on January 22, it was announced today. It’s easy to see why. Partly it was because Eliza (aka “Echo”) never really got to be anyone in particular from week to week, so there was no personality the audience could get attached to. Partly it was the dire self-seriousness of a show that was inherently silly. And partly it was the surprising lack of boobs.

Yes, boobs — that one thing the target audience expects from a show starring an established Hot Chick and Maxim cover girl — were surprisingly absent in Dollhouse’s otherwise anatomically correct stars. It’s not that they weren’t wearing anything particularly alluring; it’s that they all appeared to have snorted and/or exercised away what modest boobs they had, leaving us with a bunch of gaunt Hot Chicks without curves, humor, or personality.

And before you dismiss this out of hand, remember that Ghost Whisperer is still on the air. And that’s a show with nothing going for it except boobs.

Lesson learned: If you cast an actress who looks like a model in your show, there had better at least be some cleavage.

And maybe a personality.