The Shrinking Appeal of Spider-Man 3

Well, it’s official: at $148 million in three days, Spider-Man 3 is the most popular creation since the wheel, and not even the tidal wave of illegal DVD copies of it currently flooding Asia has kept anyone away from the theater. So why am I content to wait for cable?

Part of it, I’m sure, has to do with the ridiculous price of movies these days — $40 for two tickets and munchies is getting a wee much. Part of it has to do with the law of diminishing interest: if one doesn’t go to see a movie on opening weekend, when interest is highest, chances are one won’t go at all. But because of all the hooplah I’ve been hearing and reading about in Asia (where it opened May 1), that opening weekend has already come and gone for me by the time it opened here in the U.S. three days later.

But the other, perhaps more compelling reason, is that I’ve seen photos of Kirsten Dunst in a bikini recently. Ordinarily that sort of thing would be all the more reason to part with my $40, but the shrunken Kirsten I saw at the beach is a far cry from the pencil eraser-smuggling Kirsten of the first Spider-Man.

Kirsten Dunst in 2002

Kirsten Dunst in 2007

Obviously, suspension of disbelief is a requirement of any movie, much more for a superhero flick, but seeing photos like this is like learning that your adored heartthrob is gay — it shouldn’t matter, since movies are all illusion anyway, but it always does just the same.